Happy Mothers Day? Not for Everyone.

Happy Mother’s Day? Not for everyone . . .
However, God can redeem anyone
By Mary Zigan
Excerpted from my book, An Upside-Down Heart
The sting of the darkest Mother’s Day weekend ever still burns in my mind. On Friday morning of that weekend, my husband, Don and I had been arguing about who knows what, but the verbal assaults and bickering escalated until there was a major blow up.
I retreated to my prayer closet, which was my lower-level office. I picked up my Bible, and wouldn’t you know, the reading was from Matthew. “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you . . . , go and be reconciled . . . , then come and offer your gift.”
I said out loud to God, “No! I’m always the first one who apologizes, and I’m not going to do it this time.” There is no way I am going to say I am sorry first. The nagging words from Chapter 5 were relentless, and I caved. I went upstairs to where my husband was seated on the rattan loveseat located on the deck. Quietly sitting down beside him, I reached for his hand, but he pulled it away.
With remorse I said, “Honey, I’m sorry for my part in this argument.”
Don quickly retorted with, “It’s too late. I’m going to the farm and when I get back, I’m calling my attorney.”
My reactions to these words were fear and shock! I thought, * After all we have been through, now you’re willing to throw in the towel? I could not believe my ears.
“It’s too late,” he repeated, and he got up and left for the farm. In a panic, I thought, what am I going to do? We had no cell phones or landline at the farm. I was completely cut off from him.
With my stomach churning I did what I would typically do. I went for a walk.
My heart was heavy, my tears were hot, and fear of the unknown welled up in me as never before. These heated, hostile encounters had become a habit all too familiar, but this time Don meant business. The unknowns ahead gripped me stronger that day than I think I had ever felt them. Yet, as I walked, I sensed a voice, a Still Small Voice, saying in my spirit, “Mary, you were faithful to go and ask forgiveness. I will bring blessing and abundance to your marriage.”
Desperate almost to the breaking point, I went through the necessary motions of ordinary life on Saturday. The house was quiet, but Don’s and my hateful words to each other still rang in my head. On Sunday, I arrived at church early, hoping that Elsie and her husband, Don, would be prayer ministers that day. Elsie was a faithful prayer warrior who believed God could do anything.
At the end of the service, I nearly ran to the altar for prayer. There Elsie and her husband gently prayed with me. They encouraged me to put my trust in God for whatever the outcome might be. When I left church that day, even though everything was still uncertain, a load had been lifted.
Don didn’t return home for several days. I had anxious and unsettled feelings of the unknown that were like a vice around my heart. I prayed that somehow our love would supersede our selfishness. God had been working in my heart, had He been working in Don’s? I wondered.
After nearly a week, I had hopeful anticipation that today might be the day he would return. Wanting to put my best foot forward, I took a bubble bath, perfumed, and pulled out a pair of shorts and a T-shirt that showed off my tanned skin, and I was careful to have my attitude in check. In contrast with last week’s blowup, I hoped a gentle, quiet spirit would win his favor.
Don did return that day, and I could sense by his subdued demeanor that he was feeling some remorse. We did not discuss what had happened between us, but there was an unspoken willingness, you might say a silent truce, to ease back into the normal routine we had had previously.
The weather was perfect that summer and God was gracious to give Don and me several opportunities for solitude at the place we loved the most—our farm. We had time to walk together, to talk together, to begin a friendship together, to forgive one another, to laugh and cry together. In a sense it was a courtship. There was tenderness, respect, compassion, and kindness. It became clear that Don and I more than loved each other, we were committed for life!

Author’s note: This Mother’s Day may not be all that you would like it to be. Maybe you have unresolved issues and pain in a relationship. God can carry your burden for you and empower you with His grace to see the trial through.
If you would like to purchase the book, An Upside Down Heart, or invite Mary to speak at your conference, retreat, or Bible study, you may contact her at: mzigan2442@gmail.com

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